I am not quitting EVE. I just want to put that little rumor to rest. Nor did the alliance ‘fall apart’. It is a very undramatic story, really.
This is how it happened. One night, I was exchanging EVE mails with someone in alliance I did not know. He asked if I was the one who did the logistics for alliance. I replied yes. He asked if I was trustworthy. I found that a little appalling, being that I was the alliance executor and that I moved all the things. For free. I told him it was EVE, you couldn’t be sure that you could trust anyone, but that I would move his stuff, for free. Just make the contract to my alt- no collateral.
Now, the reason we did no collateral is because I moved many a contract per night and I simply couldn’t afford collateral on all of it.
He responded with okay. But then he made the contract and put a 2 million isk collateral on it and sent a mail saying he thought I should be able to afford that.
It was in that precise moment when something clicked. A realization washed over me. I simply did not want to do it anymore.
I didn’t want to move stuff for people who were ungrateful or cheeky.
But not only that, I realized I was just done with all of it.
I was tired of my alliance (though no fault of their own).
When our corp first created our alliance, we did so merely to have the name. The name was a symbol for us, for a corp that was stolen from us. So we got the name for the alliance. We never planned to grow it. Never planned to be leaders of Amarr Militia.
But somewhere along the way, people asked to join and were like, sure, why not. I told them we offered two things only, free teamspeak, and free logistics. I explained that a lot of my members were off and on, and would play other games from time to time. That we lived in Egghelende (non FW space) and really didn’t care about plexing anymore. That we were small gang.
Once we had several corps join, the alliance morphed into something I was never really interested in. They wanted to take systems and moons and shoot POSes and do things. They needed goals. Oh, and there were meetings. Lots and lots of meetings. And then came the problems. Blue on blue shootings and spies and dramas and so on and so forth.
And through it all, I just didn’t care. I quit caring about controlling systems years ago. I don’t care what tier we were in, or the ‘success’ of the Amarr Militia. Because really, if you’ve been in FW long enough you figure out that once you’re ‘winning’, you’re actually losing due to LP prices and all of that.
Regardless. It just became a lot of work for something that meant so little to me. Instead of having fun in a game, I realized that it had become a job that I wasn’t getting paid for.
So I gathered up my courage and quit.
I informed my Directors and let them sort out what they wanted to do. They could keep the corp & alliance going, or let it die. Everyone decided to pursue other corps, etc. I guess no one else wanted the responsibility either lol.
It has been bittersweet, I’ll admit. It is shocking how attached you can become to a corp and a group of people. A part of me feels guilty for letting go, but at some point you just gotta do what you gotta do to find joy in the game again.
But I’m not quitting EVE nor am I quitting FW. You guys aren’t getting rid of me that easily.